Existentialist Gallery

Exactly what the powers that be want from you!!!

Ghost Bustin'

So after a couple nights of bad dreams and a couple days analyzing them, I figured out the obvious. Vampires are superficial people who try to suck the life joy out of you and zombies are brainless conformist sheep who just want you to give up and join their nihilistic idiocy. 

But then, I could be reading too much into it.

Church Bulletin Doodles

Acts 2/Joel 2 the Holy Spirit makes ordinary people extraordinary servants. #pentecost 

I've left this blog fallow for too long just because I've been so busy. Maybe since I can use this iPod instead of a scanner, I can actually make the summer cartoon-diary idea work this time. Wish me luck.

Bear Necessities

 

Summer Diary

Sorry its been a few days. The yearbook took longer than I expected. So did wasting time on Pinterest. We'll see how spotty I get from here on out. I don't enjoy our scanner at home as much as the one I have at school. Then there's softball games and 4H and family stuff. Perhaps I will draw more in June, but you won't see them till July/August. Whatever. It's not like its more than a hobby. Whatever. Have a great summer everybody. Make sure you read some funnies somewhere. Maybe even in some newspapers. Won't that be quaint?

SUMMER DIARY

Don't ask. Suffice to say, some years it feels SO good to hibernate.

SUMMER DIARY

I crack myself up. This is my idea of a "dirty" joke, by the way. I'm such a dork.

SUMMER DIARY

Dedicated to a friend from high school.

SUMMER DIARY

Seriously? It has been December since I've posted any collages and LAST SUMMER since I've put any cartoons up here? I'd like to say that was due to a shameful lack of discipline, but really I've just been way way way too busy. I can't believe that 30 years ago I dreamed that this would be my vocation, not just a hobby. Today I don't even have time for a hobby, let alone this one. C'est la vie, no? C'est ci bon, c'est ci bon. Hey that reminds me of an old Eartha Kitt song.

No promises THIS summer, especially with all thats going on; dance, softball, family visits, 4H, etc. etc. But,  by girls did get me this nifty notebook for Easter, and sitting there at softball practice last night, I actually started sketching again. So, here's the first fruits. Now, back to work finishing the school yearbook, working on the district newsletter, updating the school website, yadda yadda yadda...

Here's a less sexy version of that Eartha Kitt song, only by Stan Freberg and the Muppets!

Great comic- check it out

GoComics (@gocomics) 3/21/12 6:15 PM How to Figure Out Who You Really Are: bit.ly/basicinstructi… #BasicInstructions #comics #humor

Mallory at 3/17/2010 03:19:00 AM

Sent from my iPod

facebook needs sound effects

Halloween Warning

Arrrgh.

Yes, I realize that LEGALLY, he's actually correct- but come on, it still sounds absurd and amoral coming out of anyone's mouth. That's because it is absurd and not just amoral, but immoral. How'd I do at making him look as plastic, stiff, polished and fake as I could?

By the way, here's the Wikipedia entry on why this election will be as frightening as any in our history, in case you're interested:

Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission, 558 U.S. 08-205 (2010), was a landmark decision by the United States Supreme Court holding that corporate funding of independent political broadcasts in candidate elections cannot be limited—because of the First Amendment. The 5–4 decision, in favor of Citizens United, resulted from a dispute over whether the non-profit corporation Citizens United could air a film critical of Hillary Clinton, and whether the group could advertise the film in broadcast ads featuring Clinton's image, in apparent violation of the 2002Bipartisan Campaign Reform Act, commonly known as the McCain–Feingold Act.^[2]

The South Will Rise Again!

Let's face it, Nixon had a "Southern Strategy" and Lee Atwater had Reagan start his campaign in Philadelphia, Mississippi to take advantage of "latent" prejudices essentially to the capture the Confederate voters who left the Democratic party when LBJ signed the Civil Rights Act and the Republican party has pretty much been the party of anti-intellectual, straight, white, Evangelical males ever since. Now we have Rick Perry because Mitt Romney isn't Christian enough and Sarah Palin and Michelle Michelle Bachmann are still women.

A 'C' student governor from Texas that everybody would love to have a beer with... hmmm, where have I seen this movie before?

No Mr. Bond-Market, I expect you to DIE!

Conciliatory to a fault?

Smurfalicious

Mal•Adjusted

Sheez. I forgot how much work it takes to draw, scan, process, and write these silly trifles. 

Sometimes the phonetic pronunciation fits more than others

Obstructions-R-US

Head Drama

Exclusive; Rare Sighting!

Stupid Chic

I have plenty of other things I should've been doing today, but the anger and bile just got too backed up and I had to either let it out or it was about to kill me. Sorry, loved ones, I've fallen off the wagon. I know how much political cartooning hurts everyone around me, but I just wasn't able to keep walking the straight and narrow. Tomorrow is another day and another opportunity to behave civilly. I'll ask my higher-power to help me. Meanwhile SOMEONE has to point out that politicians should really be required to pass a test in U.S. History and Civics before even being allowed to open their mouths on camera, let alone run for President.

More Equal Than Others

An homage to two great heroes, George Orwell's 'Animal Farm' and Grant Wood's 'Daughters of the American Revolution.' 

Something New

At last, something new. But I'm not promising much. As the toon implies, this is really a test-run. I had to do some PC repair for my wife and daughter so they can print project reports for 4H, since we have a combo printer/scanner, this gave me the opportunity to test them both. I'm interested in the different feel I got by just using an old fashioned #2 pencil instead of pen before scanning it into Photohop. 

Notice also the stitches from where I had that bump on my forehead removed last week. My kids say it looks creepy and my wife called me "FrankenTed" today.

I can see trying to simply keep a cartoon diary. Nothing as elaborate as "American Splendor," the cult-classic alternative/underground  autobiographical comic books by the late Harvey Pekar that I think are the inspiration for 2003 film staring Paul Giamatti, just single-panel gags riffing on the banal, mundane, tedium of being me. But I don't know if I could do that daily or even weekly, though it would certainly be good creative-discipline to try.  And I'm all about discipline, just ask my wife. 

Okay, that didn't come out right- that was meant to be an ironic statement about my being an adult-ADHD scatterbrain. If you thought it sounded like I like being disciplined, get your mind out of my gutter!

Anyway, now that I know I have a scanner at home, that's one less excuse. But, cartooning has the same difficulties as writing- "Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you. The jotting is simplicity itself - it is the occurring which is difficult." ~Stephen Leacock

I seem to find myself somewhere between fame and fortune or wide spread prominence (cartooning for thousands of readers) and absolute obscurity (cartooning just for myself). It means a lot to me that the few of you are out there, long time friends and something like "fans," encouraging me with comments on facebook about how you want me to toon s'more and post them here. Thank you, I appreciate it.